~ Mummy

Mum in a wheelchair at SGH A&E at 4am

The past few days has been rather tiring.

I haven’t had proper sleep, waking up at 3.30am.

I wake up, go to the toilet, take wudhuk and have been doing night prayers.

I pray for mummy’s health and that the suffering would not be much.

Sometimes I read Ratib, or surah Yasin or just recite selawat Syifa many times.

I sleep again at 5am and wake up for the day’s events at 6.15am.

Mummy is now alone, in isolation ward, because the Drs need to check if she has TB in her lungs.

She has been tested positive for TB in her spine…

Meaning 6 weeks of Antibiotics under IVF drip… Allah : (

I can sense she wants to give up. She misses home. She misses her grandkids, but I am in really no control of when she can be discharged.

This antibiotics also comes with its own side effects eg liver and nerves failure. But then again, all medications comes with a risk of side effects although it’s low.

Last week I sent mum to SGH at 4am, thank GOD there was no crowd. She was admitted and is under the orthopedic ward.

I love her, though at times, I am abit harsh with her as I want her to be strong as well.

The kids are oblivious to how tired I am. My right eyelids twitched badly today….

Tampines to Outram is not near. Being at SGH itself is very depressing.

I don’t know if mum can make it… will I still see mum this Ramadhan? Actually I have this fear that she might go soon. But as the older sister, I cannot show my fears. I tell the kids to treasure their grandma. I am afraid Abang can’t take it if Mummy is no longer around, being the 1^st cucu and closest to his Dadi.