~The Journey - 4 years On...
I would never have thought that 4 years since 2013, I would have the strength to write like this...
Someone wrote to me today.
Regarding Abang’s ADHD. I could see myself in her 3 years
ago. Confused and worries, cos there are many questions unanswered.
The sad thing is ADHD is not a sickness where you can see
the marks or symptoms. Kids with ADHD look normal, but their brains cannot
process some things, therefore most people who do not know about ADHD will
think and presume that the child is naturally naughty, stubborn, rude and ill-discipline.
The parents get the blame for not discipline the child thus, putting a lot of anger
and frustrations in the parents.
It really helps if both parents can accept the fact and
stick together to help the child. For my case, I was really alone because my
husband, do not believe in ADHD.
Alhamdullilah, it’s been 4 years since Abang was diagnosed. It’s
still a challenge, most days, I have to repeat myself like a parrot for him to
stop beating Adik, or for him to study and revise, but I must be honest.
Despite Abang behaving like a small boy even though he is already 10, he does
know how to behave when he is outside. He loves small kids and he is really
sweet to me sometimes.
He gets angry easily but when I talk to him softly and
nicely, he can listen. I love Abang with ALL my heart. And I am glad, Allah
still give me a chance to live for me to see Abang’s growth and to take care of
him.
Don’t give up parents.
Equip yourself with knowledge.
If you have to take leave to bring your child for check ups,
GO. You’d be surprise to see there many other kids with worse conditions than
your child when you go to Child Guidance Clinic.
Take it one day at a time. Keep in close contact with your
child’s teachers.
As for advise from parents with similar situation. My boss’s
son has ADHD. From small, he was hyper, anti social, bad in studies and could
not concentrate long in school. Fast forward to 2016, this boy went through his
O’Levels, passed with flying colours, went up stage to get outstanding award and
now in polytechnic. He even has a pilot license. He is so much better behave
all because he found a girlfriend who could encourange him.
Woah right??
My boss… never gave up on her son. That’s her advise to me.
So parents, Advise your child, remind him on the Dos and
Donts.
Rewards them for good behavior.
There will be testing times, REALLY TESTING TIMES… cry it
out. No one will know your pain, some friends may even think you are nuts to
label your child as ADHD kid. But ADHD is real.
Only those parents whose kids have ADHD / ADD / Autism will
understand. It is a struggle…
But things will get better. Believe.
Comments
I found your blog while I am searching for ADHD online. My son in P2 is having behaviour issues since young in school and we have brought him to see a Dr and went through occupational therapist. The therapist had discharged him as normal and the doctor told me if I am ready to put him on medication I can go to her and she will issue me a description. No formal diagnosis from the experts and the ball is back at our court.
The thing is, those complaints from teachers to me are very common childhood behavior issues especially from an active boy. Eg talking in class, disturbing friends because he likes talking to them, rushing through school works and making careless mistakes. Despite all those complaints, my child did well in school. Almost full marks for his tests in P1 and P2. Now the teacher wanted me to put him back to therapies and get people from REACH to continue to monitor him.
May I know, are these complaints exactly what you are getting from your boy's school teacher? Is the teacher over reacting? I have told the teacher to do what she thinks is necessary but I am thinking is this fair to my boy? He is not abusive or walking around in class. He just likes to talk. Appreciate your feedbacks on this. Thanks.
My boy seems to be not able to concentrate in class thus poor grades. Its upon his teacher's observations that I got him checked.
How do we go about checking on our son's learning/behaviour disability? I strongly suspect my son is ADHD or having some learning disability and needs intervention.