It’s been 2 weeks since I started reciting Surah Al Baqarah for the new home. Since the surah is rather long, the usual read will be about 2 pages every morning using my trusted Blue Quran after praying Fajr…..hoping that the new place will be protected from any harm. Praying hard that Rahmah and Sakeena come in from the open windows.
I learnt that reading surahtul Baqarah is a must in a new home aside from reading Surahtul Kursi and reciting the Azan on the 4 corners of the home. Other amalan can be reading Ratib and surah Yasin.
This morning, while reading the surah, nearly reaching my 2 page mark, I suddenly felt breathless as if I was gasping for air. It could be because I was reading a very long verse and I hadn’t waqaf at a point where I think I should have. I stopped for a while, took a few deep breaths but still I was gasping for air. The window beside me was open, and I reckon it would be no problem for the cool dawn air to pump in a lot of oxygen to my brains.
Ever since my friend fell unconscious due to no oxygen in her brains reasonly, I have been trying to remind myself to just stop whatever I am doing and breathe.
Well, so I breathe and breathe but I still found myself breathless. I felt weak…a sudden weakness as if my body was shutting down. Still in my telekung, my whole body fell to the carpet on the parquet platform and I suddenly felt as if I couldnt get oxygen into my lungs.
The first image that came to my mind was Adik’s face. I could feel the heart crying as I recited my syahadah slowly. And funny after that, I thought, oh it would be great for me to breathe my last breath after just reading the Quran, with wudhuk on my skin. How cool was that for my hubby to find me dead in that position? But that thought quickly turned to panic as I spoke to God softly…Please don’t take me yet, my kids need me…please please not now…not now……and I force myself to sit upright again gaining control of my breaths again.
Ok I’m still alive… Alhamdulillah Ya Rabb……Ok, I can breathe…Ok I’m OK.